Royal Enfield Constellation Load Limit....

In the early 80's my brother and I rode through Austria, France, Germany and Italy..... sort of a mini "Grand Tour". We don't always get along but any reason to head south is good enough for me...

My ride, at the time, was a single overhead cam Honda CB750 F1 with a massive Dunstall alloy tank and twin Cibie "40" rally lamps for headlamps.... find an idiot who does not dip his headlights.. turn both on and you can see the colour of the tie he's wearing.... Nice....

It did have a "tiny" problem, as we found out,..... over 70mph it burnt more oil than petrol...... this was, basically, because I had stripped down the top end to do the valves etc and "on advice" from my brother did not re ring and hone the bores... which were a bit "shiny"..... so after we found this out we stuck more to the back roads...

Chris rode a Kawasaki GPZ550 Uni-track.... great, zippy, little bike that ran really sweet....

Great ride down through Germany.... great roads and strange people.... The eagles nest near Berchesgaden is an impressive place... remember well the entrance tunnel with its wood paneling and impressive chandeliers... You could easily drive any army truck through this but it was, definitely, designed to impress.... But mostly remember the 40+ person lift that whispered you up the "house".... you got in and then got out.... no sound... no sensation of movement.... truly spoooky...

Oh yes the other memory was of the bus ride up to the entrance tunnel.... real old school bus with a driver that could only be described as a maniacal Russian shot put "lady"... single track lane... sheer drops...loose gravel and tree branches everywhere and... well... I guess the driver just likes speed... and hill climbs, with a  rally cross twist.... she was not slow....

 The mountain fortress itself was not open, in those days, and always intended to go back there now it is....

On into Austria via an unfinished, but, strangely, open tunnel we found... tarmac was good but the tunnel itself was still being lined.... you could still see the tooling marks etc on the walls... trouble was the, unfinished, toll booths were manned.... and, although, there was no sign of a "pay x" anywhere it was an interesting few moments sorting what we had against what they would take...

Austria is stunning..... and expensive.... only had changed up a few pounds for petrol... but that went at the first coffee shop... heading up the road from the tunnel and there was a sharp left up ahead.... hit the left hard (well... straights are boring...) and the view suddenly got... well... simply stunning....

We had turned to be running, high up, along one side of a valley... the other side simply being one of the best mountain views I've seen.... there was a big gravel car park/view point right on the corner exit and an impressive cafe/hotel behind...

I drifted straight into the parking area as Chris just flashed up the road ahead.... so I stroll over and order a coffee... enjoy the view... did not have a camera on this trip and phones were not that mobile in those days.... the view was so big though, a stunning wall of snow capped peaks, it would have been hard to capture it properly.. (Ric/Neil... would liken it to heading for the tunnel, with the psychedelic lighting, near Grenoble)... so through Austria and onto Italy... Venice awaits and time was short....

My first time in Italy so my brother pulls up alongside me and starts to shout... "Whatever you do DON'T ride near to white line in a corner cos there mad here and vans will......" just at that point a big blue van flies round this corner, towards us, straddling the white line.... and Chris has to dodge in behind me very sharpish.... "SEE" he shouts....

So funny.... so very funny..... I do cut corners (cough) a bit but the Italians are mad.... probably wear out the horns faster than their tyres...

Another entertaining moment... I was riding along behind him on a short section on Italian "motorway", near Venice, when something suddenly flips up from the road and hits me in the chest... and then falls onto the top of my tank....

It was the front sprocket retaining plate for a Kawasaki...... My brother was riding a Kawasaki..... Bugger... so pulled him over... whipped of the sprocket cover to find... his was still there.... Nice... but often wondered about what happened to the guy who lost it...

Anyhoo onto the subject of the title..

We pulled into Aosta.... which is up in the top left hand corner of Italy... not far from Mont Blanc and its famous tunnel....

We had stopped in a run down area on the edge of Aosta because of.....

1/ It was getting late in the day..... and...

2/ There was this big shiny square glass built motorcycle shop.... looked really out of place..... bikes on the ground level and clothing and helmets on the second... got the impression that the area was some sort of tax haven.... going by the prices...

So its late in the day and we ask for directions to a campsite.... you just know its gonna be... "ah my cousin runs campsite... best campsite... you come... you follow... I show..."  and that's exactly what happened....

So we follow this little Renault van down some dodgy lanes and into the campsite... must admit it really was a nice site.... not the best by any means.... but clean, good toilets and a cafe, of sorts,...

We set up our tents and were walking up the site when a couple siting outside this old, huge, canvas tent said "hello" in the broadest of scouse accents.... cannot remember there names now but a nicer pair of people it would be harder to meet...  do remember he was a good 6ft 4 and she was a petite 4ft 10.....

Ended up spending the evening with them.... listing to the story of how they had just been through Yugoslavia and stayed with a local family, for three days, while a new dynamo, for his Enfield, was being shipped out to him from the UK....

He had travelled down to the bottom of Portugal the previous year and Poland the year before that.... all on this immaculate Royal Enfield Constellation....  Respect..... Even more so in the morning.... but read on...

Never really thought about it but were are talking away... sitting outside this massive tent... I mean massive... they slept in one half and the bike was parked in the other......

Were sitting there while he's cooking away on a two ring camping stove more suited to a caravan and the gas bottle is a dumpy 4.5kg one... not some tiny canister... he's using proper pots n pans brought from home.... proper full sized frying pan.... kettle... mugs... yes it was probably in there somewhere to...

Just assumed he had a trailer around the back...

So... in the morning Chris and myself awoke to watch this pair load up the Constellation...

First off... out came wooden boxes... homemade ply and baton affairs... and everything got put into a wooden box of one size or another... and these boxes got strapped, not bunged, onto the bike.....

Both my brother and I watched in amazement...  just more and more boxes going on.... to say they had a system is an understatement for this couple.... large boxes... small boxes..... one after the other after the other....

After they had finished... it was stacked so high that when the girl sat "into" the rear seat you could not see her.... truth.... from back or sides she was hidden...

We say goodbye and he climbs on and we watch this "mobile parcel" wobble off up the dirt road and out of the campsite.....

How much weight.... dare not think about it....

How on earth the frame did not snap is beyond me.....

Those poor tire's....spokes..... ???...

Respect does not even cover it..... The miles they had travelled.... and those to come no doubt....
 
When I asked him about the it before he left... he simply said... "if you are not in a hurry you will get there..... if you rush you may not.."

Lesson learnt...   two on a push bike in the UK is an offence.... the family and a goat on a Honda Crunch in India is normal... I will, and always, say.. the more "civilised" we get the more stupid we get...

Its not a matter of whether you think he was a danger to others or not, as in our modern "PC" world he may well not be allowed to travel like that.... but it worked.... nothing was going to fall off the way it was strapped.... he could repair any box easily..... he could even have repaired the dynamo, once he had worked out what was making the noise.... And yes he had a full toolkit to...