Perks of the Job....

A long, long time ago I worked as a "Saturday" boy on the forecourt of the, now gone as is the Blockbusters that replaced it, Berners Street garage, in Ipswich, for some extra funds.

It was a very busy forecourt in its day but one of my main memories was the husband and wife doctors who always seem to fill up on Saturdays....

She was brilliant, bouncy and full of life... always chatting away to me and the garage mechanics.... a very beautiful lady.... and then.... usually about an hour later the husband would arrive..... half awake... dishevelled..... and, always, looking totally knackered.....  Often wondered about that....

I have every sympathy for a point of sales person as, even in my short time there, a few people were aggressive and abusive, trying to bully to not pay for something.. or say "Oi i gave you a fiver" when it was actually only a pound (stuff was a lot less money back then).

But, on the other hand, sometimes something great happens....

A certain Mr Nicholls used to come in... now as the "Nicholls" used to run most of the second hand car dealerships in Ipswich.... and, of course, he knew my father.... he would often throw his Range Rover keys at me and say "park that" as he went to talk to the garage boys about some deal or other...

Got quite used to that.... park the Rangy.... park the Ford.... park the ....  and then one day... he walks towards me with a really big smile on his face......  throws me the keys, as usual......    I look at the keys in my hand.... and the fob says Ferrari..... FERRARI....... "don't scratch it" he says.... walking off.... laughing...

I walk outside and there sits a new 246GT Dino Ferrari.... I kid you not... Woo Hoo.... Drive a Ferrari (well park it anyway) every boys dream....

 The car park in question was up on the roof of the garage, so its just a quick out, round and up the ramp..... but you could go up to the old hospital and round and down a longer route.... Yep you guessed it.... took me a bit longer to park the Ferrari than it did the Range Rover....

But I tell you what.... they maybe great to drive on the track/ open road but in town there pants.... the nice big wheel arches mean you have absolutely no chance of seeing the kerb... you sort of have tunnel vision between those wheel arches (not as bad, though, as the Corvette Stingray I was towed in a few years later... now that's a story for another time...) and, in fact, vision all round is diabolical compared to the Rangy...

Happy bunny to have driven one though..... even if it was for only a few moments..

There was one (well two for one really) other highlight while working there......

You have to wonder sometimes about the logic your boss uses when doling out various jobs for people and in the instance it was that he sent me to pick up a brand new Hillman Avenger Tiger from Chelmsford and drive it back to Ipswich... Its 1972... its a brand new Avenger Tiger.... and he sends an 18 year old...... (just don't tell the car's new owner)....

So off I toddle on the train to Chelmsford...

and collect this very sporty looking motor...

The mechanic handed me the keys and then said... (every boys dream this one)... The engine all up and test run so don't you go labouring that engine.. (here it comes)... don't care what revs you do just don't lug it.... (for those not to mechanically minded - all the extra strain of driving at too low revs just kills an engine)

He did not have to tell me twice, but i wish he had told me more - read on....

I'm into the car and out on the road.... first impressions.... nice but odd.. definitely more go, brakes rubbish but just thought that was because the were new and not worn in, but it just "sat" really odd...

Cruise out of Chelmsford and onto the A12, liking the pull away this thing has but now just cruising along watching the passing cars rubber neck at the Tiger....
   
Past Colchester and down onto the Dedham straight section were this TR6 pulls along side me... looks over.... and pumps the throttle two twice..... Come-on I'm 18.... What you gonna do....

He floors it... I floor it.... and he sort of just goes backward... this thing has some get up and go...
and the Tiger just pulled away.

Clarkson would have been proud - well may be not... nasty little Hillman beating a proper sports car...

So up the hill and head into the "always entertaining" right hand bend.... just on the legal speed limit and the car..... well it just started to squirm..... badly....  got a nice roll on and it was getting past the new trousers time please and nearer to the "my this field look nice".

Don't see it so much these days but that bend used to be lethal with diesel spills, tire ruts and an adverse camber... seen many cars in that field, most on there roof.....

TR6 comes flying past waving a salute (your word here) and disappears off as I just say to myself.. "Oh dear what happened there".. (again your words here)..

The rest of the short drive back was uneventful but had a word with the main mechanic...he laughed and then said....

"Spent over £450 on that engine and nothing of the suspension, brakes or chassis... we were all wondering how that would work out"

Wish the mechanic had told me that when I had picked it up....

Link to the wiki page here:- https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hillman_Avenger where is says
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Modifications included the 1500 GT engine with an improved cylinder head with enlarged valves, twin Weber carburetors and a compression ratio of 9.4:1. The engine now developed 92.5 bhp (69 kW) at 6,100 rpm. The suspension was also uprated, whilst brakes, rear axle, and gearbox are directly from the GT.
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Don't know about the suspension being uprated on the one I drove as it was crap... but then again the "Honest John" review site ( http://classics.honestjohn.co.uk/reviews/hillman/avenger/ ) says...

                        Low survival rate due to shocking build and corrosion issues

Not the nearest I have come to being killed, as that honour belong to Andy and his Kawasaki 750 widow-maker I had the misfortune to be on the back off,  but it was a tad to close for comfort.

What Do You Belive in....

 Faceblogtweet being so full of religious hate comments, and a recent post about "Real Men don't hit Woman" just got me wondering if there is much difference between the two ideals.

They say there's two things we do without conscious thought... Eat and Reproduce..... But I think there is a third.. Greed... (or more correctly "The wont of other peoples life...") as the primordial part of our brain has far more control than most people realise....

And then there's the word GOD.... even an agnostic may cry "Oh God that hurts" if he smashes his thumb rather than the nail he was trying to hammer home...

The word God has been ingrained into our DNA for a Milena and it seems, to me, that there are three main types (please read this as just an opinion and not a truth/ absolute/ your word here).

Firstly..... The all powerful just/ unjust "Monotheism" by which ever name you know him...          
                 my main problem with these is the promise that cannot be proven

Secondly The "Polytheism" system of many, many gods..... lots of good things in this system for                          personal and not invasive control

Thirdly    The "Our God is the One but we will respect yours" A system that the Romans (side note..                    ever wondered about the 25th of December ) and Inca's (and probably others I an not fully                  aware of) used to great advantage in empire expanding

Real men don't hit woman... does not ring true to me and as reflex situations happen... so the statement should read "Why did this man hit a woman" (or woman hits man).

One person who hits another more than once may have a problem with themselves not the other party as, in truth, most bullies are cowards inside and need constant proof they are better by making someone else feel worse/ make someone there slave. But if they do it because they like it that's a whole other ball game...

Does this equate to a single god/ sect with rules that you must obey..... They are right and everyone else is wrong.....

The "Poly" and "Roman" at least have some leeway, but you were still likely to be "punished"

The religious problem in the headlines, at the moment is mainly there because they want to prove themselves right by pressing every possible button until they get a reaction.... because they believe that "others will come to try and stop us" every time there is a response it just proves them right in there eyes... 

You can pick any topic you like and they will have an anti view of it.... 

The world wars are prevalent in the news so the "there was no Holocaust" was a perfect button push..

We can burn your book but you cannot burn, or even comment on, ours.... button push....

Not that people should not respond but how its done needs to be better thought out... The old adage of "if you don't understand it kill it" is used way to often....

No body wants to die earlier than they have to so most will do anything just to live a little longer but to some this just means that they get "high" on your fear for a little longer, as in there eyes you are worthless...

If 1,000,000 people just walked into there territory, you could do it for the bikers, and started talking to people, help them, feed them...men and woman equally... what would happen?.... if they shot the first 1,000.... would you keep on walking.... but if you did would it change things.... I'd like to think so... 

Ever since there have been conflict both sides would tell there people "they eat babies" etc to breed hatred... but, apart from genocide, how many times have two waring factions ended up friends... until the next fight.....

A small number can easily control a larger though fear but if the larger number "removes" the smaller then are the larger..... well there is no easy answer and as long as someone wants to be "higher/ better/ have more" than another there never will be.

And finally the Fourth religious option.....
The "we don't own anything... we just borrow it for the time were here" . This appeals to me as it simply states we are here... we use/ make stuff... we return our nutrients...

The body needs no promises, just fuel... you may feel you need a purpose to live, otherwise why do we exist... but in reality the body just needs food to fuel it until the day it cant repair itself anymore. It is the brain that causes the problem and as we are just an animal that thinks to much...

You can ask an American Indian how he feels but you can't an Original Tasmanian... Whatever we think we are... if nature joins in we are but specs of sand....

Get a Life humanity and realise we are all the same... were here.... we live... we die.... If you want to believe in something that's fine but don't ram it down other peoples throat.... its what you contribute while your here that matters... NOT what you have or control

Useful Bits of Kit for Motorcycle Touring

For the last 30+ years I have headed to the south of France for my " Col du something" fix with the odd excursion to Austria, Germany, Switzerland and Italy....

Basically "Col" means pass... a route over a high point.... Narrow roads..... shear drops..... wandering animals.... my kind of motorcycling heaven.... and not something like the Stelvio with its straight, hairpin, straight, hairpin format but the out of the way ones where the map looks like someones dropped spaghetti on it..... Anybody can hang to the throttle in a straight line but, personally, I find that boring....

Straight roads and motorways are just a means to get to where the real riding starts.

So.... Useful bits of kit....

The usual items.... spare bulbs, fuses, relays, leatherman, roll of electrical tape and tools relevant to the bike ie screw, torx, allen, other drivers/ sockets to remove fairing panels etc.

Laser 4929 1/4" Drive Swivel Head Ratchet (they do make a 3/8" version to)
http://lasertools.co.uk/item.aspx?cat=1287&item=5393

Love this little ratchet.... use it as a ratchet... use it as a "T" bar.... use it as a screwdriver... and its a lot stronger than it looks... couple of sockets, an extension to take driver "bits" and your sorted.

Electric air pump and a tyre plugger kit.....
Punctures are not optional for any wheeled vehicle and there is so much less stress if you know you have a good chance of getting moving again rather than siting by the roadside waiting for recovery.... or a friend to run the wheel to the nearest garage (a certain CBR600 owner might remember this).....

You did bring the tools to remove the wheel...... NO!..... Me neither as, these days, I get breakdown cover for anything that's not a quick fix...

Used the cylinders before but after buying a pump similar to this....

http://www.adventurebikewarehouse.com/MotoPressor-Tyre-Pump-Compact-Light-Weight

There's just no contest in usability.....

http://www.stopngo.com/pocket-tire-plugger-for-all-tubeless-tires/

Love my "plugger" no glue... no mess... and got a puncture in a 500 mile old tire that I used for another 10,000 miles before changing...

Still with the plug in.... and the only pressure loss was the usual odd pound over time/ standing and that always happens....

Check out this link for info on the gas cartridges and pressure loss.....

http://www.bikeforums.net/bicycle-mechanics/154847-co2-cartridge-info.html

One of these might me a more compact option for a "plugger" tool....
http://www.dynaplug.com/products.html

And the best pump choice seems to be this...
http://www.bestrestproducts.com/c-10-cyclepump-ez-gauge.aspx    

But make your own mind up on this and choose you own method.... cylinders or pump... but do carry a kit

Micro Start Jump start.....
http://www.zenoverland.com/electrical/antigravity-micro-start-pps-xp-1.html

This has been my best buy to date.... its SO damn flexible.... it has  19, 12 and 5 volt outlets so it will run your laptop...runs all your  12v camping lights etc... and anything USB powered .... how useful is that...

We are all used to the huge jump start boxes you see at the auto parts shop.....

So when this tiny 6x3x1 inch "thing" arrives my first thoughts were  "Yea Right..... No Way in Hell"  Well I re-watched the video and still thought the same.... but as I had been mug enough to buy it.... its time for a my "real world" test...

As I have an old Honda HRV.... (just for winter you understand...) I pulled of the battery earth lead and connected up the microstart...

10 TIMES it started the car and still had all FIVE lights showing.....

As this was all in the works car park one lunchtime, with several people watching,  a workmate says give it a go on my diesel Nissan pick up.....

Removed the earth lead again.. connected the microstart and started the pick up TWICE.... before the little unit dropped ONE light...

So that's 12 starts on the trot and it still had enough charge left to run my Asus N550 laptop for a couple of hours..... impressed.... Mega impressed and lets just say that one or three people watching went bought one....

There are now lots of cheaper versions/ copies of this unit about ,and at half the price, but my XP-1 has started a few cars and vans over the winter.... been used for a few camping holidays.... My neighbour borrowed it when he had  a charging problem on his Yam trike.... its been dropped a few times... and kicked across the floor once.... so bashed and trashed but still works like new....

And something you might not think off...

Pouches... The little rectangular rubberised case that comes with some Logitech mice etc or the zipper pouch from a cordless beard trimmer are well useful for carrying your tools about rather than "solid" plastic cases..

I keep all my driver bits, inc security type, in one pouch with the 1/4 drive ratchet n extension and the tire plugger stuff in another..... makes it much easier to fit a little nook on the bike to store it. Several little bags are far more flexible to pack than one large one.

Another little trick....
Memory Foam.....

On the Ulysses there is a small space either side of my seat catch mechanism, by the rear light.....

So I  got a, thick, scrap piece of memory foam from a local bed warehouse and cut it to a snug fit for each space...... in one I cut out the centre, from one end, to make a space for a headlight bulb, cutting off  a little square of the removed piece to make a "plug"... so the bulb is totally protected by the foam.... in the other, from the top, I cut out cubes (like in a camera case)  and stored spare fuses, other bulbs and a relay (the Buell has 4 but there all the same type).

This does work very well as they have been on the Buell for over three years now and are still protecting there contents....(Memory foam seems to work better than ordinary foam as just seems to last longer and does not break up/ go crumbly etc...)

RECOVERY INSURANCE
I have travelled without it.. but then again I was on a  Honda VFR750FJ... arguably the best all round bike ever built... it was certainly the most over engineered (the right hand centre stand bolt is a left hand thread) and Honda lost money on every one of these they sold.... sort of like the Bugatti Veyron of its day... shame it only had 100hp not 1000.... might have been more tricky to ride though on its skinny little tires...

But the Buell Ulysses is a different story..... not so much a case of if.... just when its going to break down.... still love it though... character by the bucket load...

So.... Travel/ Recovery insurance... used a few... been stung by some.... but since I was recommended these people....       https://www.eurorescue.co.uk/      I have always used them.

When my friends Aprilia broke down in the Dordonge they were brilliant and when it turned out that the locals did not have the right box of tricks to fix it... cars were arranged..both to carry on the holiday and get back to Calais and the car to get home from Dover, with the bike being shipped back a couple of weeks later. All simply done by phone and they called back at the times they said they would....

They even rung the ferry and altered the ticket details for him as he decided not to hotel it for the last night but just carry on homeward...

You never know whats going to happen and as YOU can always get home by one form of transport or the other... the BIKE is a different story.... So unless your on an old hack you don't mind walking away from.... get insurance...

And one VERY IMPORTANT last thing.....

Which is to do with walking away from a dead bike..... ALWAYS carry water and food (carry"sports" power bars myself)  so you can walk away to find help/ phone signal.. might be less important these days with all the new towns springing up everywhere.... but like meeting, head on, the only car you've seen on the tightest/ worse possible bend on that road the chances are you will have your problem at the remotest of places...

Gangsters in Dinner Suits

A very good friend of mine, once, coined the phrase "gangsters in dinner suits" during a conversation about the hierarchy of HA and who you should worry about more... The "face" that you see or the people behind the scenes who actually run it all.... probable a mute point though as upsetting either will end badly...

With all this facebook twittering going on lately about the election's lost and misprinted ballot forms I feel that the term more than applies to the present "system".

Were there more errors than with previous elections is the first question to ask and, I suppose, who gained the most from those lost/ spoilt papers is the second....

My days at the Corn Exchange in the early 80's brought me into contact with local council members regularly and it never ceased to amaze me how much info they left laying around after a meeting.... Rejected ideas/ plans in the waste bins and they rarely removed the used flip board pages.

I do remember some eye opening info about the Ipswich airport.... plans and strategies.... and even, once, a stack of files left on a meeting desk that had 316 Clapgate lane on it.... which is the house I grew up in...  So wanted to look but who knows if they were left there as a test or what the repercussions would have been if I was found reading them...

Did you know that Crown pools should have had a separate high diving pool at the back.... but funding "changed" (read that how you will) and it was not built.....

The really interesting bit is that one of the guys building the pools asked a councillor where the toilets were..... this was about two weeks before the official pools opening...... There wasn't any.... they were all in the high diving area...... which was not longer being build..... talk about headless chickens.....

Anyone who knows the pools knows then toilets are a bit oddly shaped..... that's because they were originally designed as storage rooms... The beer cellar ended up in the pump room... bit warm in there...

Anyway as to the title of the blog...

Is it, now, what you see you should be worried about.... for whoever appears to be running the country its only a guideline for a perceived direction... The underlying big brother (or should that be big business) strategy is far more dangerous to the freedom we think we have.

The people behind the scene, the advisers, those with "invested" interests or those who crave power are the ones you should worry about as while there's a profit to be made at someone elses expense then all is good but when the plan fails, or the countries broke, they will be the first to leave without so much  as a backward glance or care..... not my fault....

As we are so far down this line now all any government can do is rob Peter to pay Paul..... at every level....

If you go back to when the photo card part of the driving license was issued.... There was lots of noise about your driving licence being, and always will be, free...
               when they brought in the photo card.....
                                      that only lasted 10 years....
                                                         and then you pay for the renewal....
This was, so little, mentioned at the time that 10 years later there's a lot of people driving about without a valid card..... Que the governments usual comment... you should have know this...

And now were going to lose the "paper" part altogether... so the driving licence is no longer "free"....  something that's not mentioned at all now....

Car tax disc's.... people do have short memories but its always been the case that if the seller kept/ refunded the tax then the new owner had to tax back to the beginning of the month.... so that's months tax was paid twice....

Now its a mainstream event everybody going "hang on a minute"... Apparently the government has gotten really nasty on this one with instant fine letters going out for hundreds of pounds and a huge rise in clamping for , so called, untaxed vehicles..... even when the fault has been caused by the DVLA itself....

You're not telling me that they can send out an instant refund or fine and can't work out how to refund tax on a daily (not monthly) basis.... I can understand a monthly basis for the paper disc but as the new electronic system has a button refunds by month.... how hard can it be to refund by day..... after all its just a number.... x of 12 used or x of 365 used..... "she canne handle it capan....."

The statement that the money is used to pay for the speedy refund process... well how much does a cheque and postage actually cost the government... I would doubt if 2% of the new revenues total (read tax on tax) was used in the refund process

I will say, and stand by it, if everyone refused to pay car tax..... will they fine the lot of us... NO

Car tax has been become a tool to persuade people to buy new cars but ,hay, if you want to ride round in that old gas guzzler we'll charge you for it....

Stick the tax on fuel....the more miles you do, or the less mpg the vehicle does, the more you pay.... simples.... and you then don't need the staff who sort out the tax/ sorn etc so government jobs gone that don't affect services, hospitals and elderly care......

God this is turning into a rant......

So.....

VAT call it what it is... a blanket tax........   a state tax......

The government slimmed down the public sector staff recently and let go a lot of sorely needed staff... Why didn't they drop the VAT to, say, 8% and no one can claim it back....

And then you could have sacked most of the VAT staff that everybody hates anyway..... business's could sack the highly paid people who work out how not to pay tax.... the government has more money...everyone, effectively, has more money in the bank to spend..... its a win win scenario.... 

Never happen though as again the "gangsters in dinner suits" want more than you have...
                                           (and yes I have written that right)

Memories of the Keys

Back in 1979 I would to go to a pub called the Henley Cross Keys, which was a favourite haunt for motorcyclists, orange people, a few locals and a horse.

It really was a great place to go as it was truly neutral territory.... anyone could go there and be welcomed. There was an initial HA problem (in those days they wanted to make there presence "felt" at any "biker" do) but this was soon; and unusually, amicably, resolved.

The landlord and lady moved into the keys the previous year from the Bentley Case is Altered which although being told "ya gotta go there" by many a friend I never went...... and Judy's story and love of motorcycles started much earlier and, at the age of 18 she became the youngest landlady in the country, taking over at the Fox and Hounds in Ramsden Heath, Essex.

So the "keys" became my local.....  and then my home for a while...

The landlady Judy was beaten up and thrown down the stairs by her husband, who then walked out taking everything of value. Luckily Judy only had bad bruising and nothing broken. In the very small world that it is my father knew of Judy's husband and did not have a kind word to say about him, but then it never ceased to amaze me how many people my father knew and was know by..... there were high hundreds, from all over the country, attending his funeral in 1990.

Fat Bob, a long time friend of Judy's, came to help her but work commitments meant that the first week was a problem and so by very strange connection he asked me if I could help out...

I said yes and one week turned into six months... wondered many times since how different my life would have been if I had just said no.....

The days were interesting as with little money and little food its surprising how inventive you get. But the nights and especially the weekends were always brilliant.... And as i knew, or knew of, most of the "customers" (which was part of the reason Bob asked me in the first place) it was a blast.

The juke box simply got opened up and if you wanted a record on there... on there it was... Bands played in the biggest room which ended up sort of purple and black with a postured ceiling and written on walls....

The "middle" room was kept clean and "normal" with wheel backed chairs and polished tables

And the end "tap" room was for the locals with a tiled floor and bench seating... but it did end up with a pool table in it... We liked the locals but the locals did not always like us. This was never truer than with the matriarch that lived in the one house opposite

I have enough memories to write a book but the ones I can repeat, and remember, I will add here...
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First that comes to mind was one cold winters night, with not to many customers, and no wood for the fire.... someone says.... "I have an idea" and off they all toddle....

Did not think much of it but about half an hour later I went outside to the toilet (they were outside in those days....) when from up the road and coming round a bend were six motorcycles....... with said passengers holding onto a (cough) tree...... gobsmacked..... three bikes each side of the "tree" slowly coming down the road...... 

Ya gotta love the old days with little traffic and a freedom that is lost today.... and we invented the CBT....... Carrying Big Trees certainly teaches you balance and control.....

So warm customers for the evening then......
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We had a music festival one weekend with bands playing off the back of a 40ft trailer and bales of stray for boundaries and seating.... very basic but a great weekend all the same....

There are two, related,  memories here and one being that on the Sunday afternoon Bob, Judy, Andy and myself were sorting and counting out the takings on the bar counter..... so there were piles of notes everywhere....... people still coming in and out of the pub..... when the police chief came in, as he often did...  he just stood there looking at us and the through flow of people....... before saying "aren't you worried about someone stealing this money" we all stopped and looked at each other..... then a customer, simply, turned and said "why... who's gonna steal from here...."

And the other memory being that with several plain clothed policemen, and more than a few cars watching us..... having a great time..... someone broke into a nearby post office and stole loads...
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There is one person from those days I would like to meet again, or at least know if the bugger is still alive...... So......  Mark Herman Garron..... if its still ticking drop me a post....

Guess you don't want people on here to know the twisted testicle story..... but I will never forget that poor little nurse, at the Lakenheath base hospital, you picked up and kissed before simply legging it across the grass to where I was waiting on my old CX500...... You're such a big guy and she was such a little nurse.....
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You don't often realise that you are part of something unique, you just enjoy the moment, but when its gone....

Embarrassed by your Parents

Just a quick one this....

I worked as a Cellar man, for nearly five years, at the Ipswich Corn Exchange in the early 80's. Brilliant job but totally crap wages for the workload as for my last two years I would have a list of events one month in advance and on the day management would turn up with just the girls and the cash to run the bars.

I did everything.... ordered the stock..... I would assemble the mobile bar units.... clean the lines..... set up and rotate the stock...... you name it i did it...  even transported everything to wherever the event was happening, either within the complex or at one of the towns sports centre's or Christchurch mansion or "Faulty Towers" as we used to call the old council offices... wonder if I have any pension there... as the rules are now changing....

Anyway the (meant to be quick) story

I do get migraines occasionally and one day, about three years in, having a migraine.... not in work..... definitely not capable of dialling in sick.......

David ,the bars manager, rang up to check that I was OK....

Not a problem you might think......








As he had done this before........









But my father answered the phone.......









And he said.........









Paul...... Paul who...... and puts the phone down.......

Totally true story...... When I went into work the following day, and several days after.... everyone just kept saying "Paul... Paul who...." or "Who are You" and David was in stitches telling me what my father had said; as, of course, he had not told me anything....

You wanna guess the favourite comment on my leaving card a couple of years later.... you just don't live something like that down.....

Alcohol and Disapearing Friends

Nightlife in the early seventy's in Ipswich was limited.... not that there was no choice of venues to go to, but a pint and a fight was usually the norm..... so I used to head out Woodbridge way for the brilliant bands that did the Village hall circuit, Ahh Bloodstone where are you now, and the locals verses the yanks, think Bentwaters and Woodbridge bases, always made life interesting....

Still the odd fight but much more fun and the gangs having the bundle often ended up buying each other drinks..... and comparing bruises....

Mind you, regarding the yanks, you steered clear of the vets but grunts were up for anything.... and the party's.... all Ill say is strip football at 3 in the morning with JD soaked steaks on the barbecue and skinny dipping on Sizewell beach with ammo cases full of Bud....Michelob..... and JD... good times.... Summer of 69... mine was 72, 73 and 74.

Anyway the story....

One of our American friends was having this leaving party at Broomswell village hall and he had asked my friend Keith and myself if we would bar tend for him... Simple job really as he had set up these three 25lt brewing tubs.... one with a Harvey Wallbanger mixture... one Bourbon/ Whisky based and a concoction of his that can only described as "there go my taste buds" which went down really smooth then just exploded in the stomach and burnt it way out.... both ends if I remember rightly....

Brilliant night was has by all but after a session of laying on the floor under one of the taps there is a couple of hours that I, surprisingly, have no memory of......

So in the small hours of the morning when things were finally winding down.... Keith, Nigel and myself wobbled off across the field to the car..... and our sleeping bags....

We were talking bollocks/ putting the world to rights, like you do when you're pissed, but I remember talking to Keith when he simply vanished..... So I turned to Nigel..... who had disappeared as well....

Standing there... thinking..... slowly..... "Ah hell... don't know what you two are up to but I'm getting some kip...." I remember saying, and staggered back to the car...

In the morning I wake up to find the mud covered bodies of Keith and Nigel snoring away and the car looked like the tide had come in.....gone out..... and come back in again....

It would seem that they had started digging two trout hatchery lakes in this field and I was the only one who found the path....  made me smile....

Apparently those two had been crawling around, one in each hole.... looking for each other in the dark.....  before finally climbing out and heading to the car.

Did think it was funny but it was easier to get another car than clean this one..... good job dad owned a scrap yard....